We Travel to China to Investigate Their Fabled Melt-Proof Ice Pop
Legend has it that in China there exists a frozen treat so incredibly powerful that it never melts, even if left in room temperature.
The following takes place between 3:40pm and 6:50pm. Events occur in real time… if you’re really slow at reading.
3:40pm
Our reporter makes contact with the ice candy in question referred to simply as “Banana” and manufactured by Nestle, China. He purchases it from a 7-11 but later learns that they are sold in virtually every store around the country.
Although the name might imply a banana flavor the frozen treat actually consists of a plain vanilla ice cream core encased in a yellowy gelatinous “peel”. The consumer is meant to peel back the jelly-like substance to eat the vanilla deliciousness inside much like one would do to an actual banana.
Our reporter, takes a deep breath before opening the package. As he removes the wrapping Banana emerges reminding him of a beautiful amber jewel. Resisting the urge to eat it right away he commences his mission.
4:12pm
Approximately thirty minutes has passed since Banana was placed on the burning hot pavement under the intensely scorching sun of a Chinese afternoon. With our agent watching intently he reports no signs of melting at all.
4:40pm
A full hour into the mission, our reporter claims to see a clear sheen over the yellow gelatinous part. Could this be the early stages of some melting? “Not yet” he thinks adhering to the strict scientific meaning of “melt” – to change physical properties.
Banana’s shape remains completely unaltered. Therefore it simply did not melt.
5:47pm
Banana has now sat for two hours straight on the increasingly hot sidewalk and still has not melted. In fact, its condition has remained unchanged since the previous hour. Our reporter, however, is beginning to feel the effects the heat. With sweat dripping from his brow he begins asking himself why he came all the way to China just to watch a popsicle on the sidewalk for hours on end. He should be going to the Great Wall or something. The mission appears to be in jeopardy.
6:46pm
Over the third hour our reporter has regained his sanity after realizing that he can also check out women walking past while watching over Banana. It too had held strong without changing shape at all. The sun, however, appears to have recognized its own impotence and drifted off over the horizon to the west, perhaps to melt some ice cream in Europe.
Satisfied with the experiment and ready to report that we have truly come across a “melt-proof ice pop”, he picks up Banana and begins to peel it so that he may victoriously devour its vanilla innards.
However, upon rupturing Banana’s yellow gelatinous coating a deluge of sticky melted vanilla ice cream oozes out onto his hands.
Our Reporter’s Conclusion
“It did not melt. I could have stayed there who knows how long and it probably wouldn’t have melted. However! I don’t think we can really call Banana a melt-proof ice pop in the strictest sense of the term. The yellow gelatinous peel is made out of a gummy like substance. Since gummy is always solid it won’t break down in higher temperatures. Even though the ice cream inside has become a liquid mess, the overall integrity of Banana holds. Can I finally do some sightseeing now? ”
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